Peas: The First Taste

You're welcome. Happy Friday!

Do the Next Thing

Over the years, I've called my mom countless times, often crying about a hurt, a change, a stressor, a husband, a child. Lately, I've cried (I cry a lot, yes) most about feeling isolated, about familial change, about the persistent cold and grey of life and weather. Some days I wake up and just feel drained to my core. I am overwhelmed by loneliness, by the weather, by distance from family and friends, by the difficulties of life, by a teething toddler. The tasks of the day loom until they paralyze me into inactivity. I often feel so overwhelmed by "being a wife," "being a Christian," "being a mom," or, you know, just "being," that I sit and do nothing, because I am so overwhelmed I don't know where to start. My day is a mirror to my life and I'm not quite sure how to handle either. And so, I call my mom. 

Do you know what she often says? Has said over the years?

Do the next thing.

This is wisdom. A few years ago, this wisdom seemed like a slap in the face. I mean, what about my feelings and the fact that life is HARD? Come on, Mom! Have some compassion. I would resist this advice, wallow in my hard life a bit more, do a bit less, and end my day feeling wearier than when I began it. 

This past August, there was a day when I realized that I had changed a little. We had just moved into our new home in our new village in our new country. All our earthly possessions where strewn haphazardly over every available square inch. Mac was, well, a baby. Ben was off to his new job. I didn't know a soul in our new town, barely a soul at all in the whole country. And I felt so overwhelmed. The isolation choked me, the gigantic task of creating a home out of chaos daunted me so greatly that I laid down on the carpet in my bedroom and closed my eyes. I just wanted to avoid thinking about anything. After about five minutes, I sat up suddenly and my thought process went something like this: "Well, this is dumb. Get over it, Amanda. Don't let this beat you. Get dressed, stop wallowing, and get going on the next thing." And it worked. I got up, got dressed, and tackled my day. Not the whole day at once, but one little thing at a time. 

Do the next thing.

I still wallow. I'm quite good at it. But sometimes, at least more often than I used to, I put my big girl panties on, follow my mom's advice, and do the next thing. Change Mac's diaper. Answer emails. Load the dishwasher. Do a German lesson. Plan our next trip. The weight that kept me wallowing slowly lifts. I get distracted from my problems by very practical things. Joy creeps into the mundane. And as I do each next thing, I find that the duties of the day are less daunting, more manageable.  And, oddly enough, those bigger things that keep me up at night, that are a very real weight to my soul? They are less daunting too. 

'til next time.

Beijing

Beijing. Where to even begin. Looking back at my trip, different images flash through my mind. Brilliantly red Spring Festival decorations crowning every door. The smell of delicious spices that I can't even name. My first experience with Sichuan peppers (imagine a sudden burst of citrus and your tongue going numb). The sound of a language so foreign to my ears that I found myself astounded that anyone could be fluent in it. The strange feeling that I was on a stage. All the time. It seems blue eyes make one an instant celebrity in Beijing. And a wonderful time spent with my sister and friends. I honestly have no clue how to write about all the different experiences I had in Beijing, so I've decided to let some of my pictures do the talking. Enjoy!

Tiananamen Square

Sausages and underwear

Lovely friends and the Temple of Heaven

The Great Wall

A ruined portion of the Great Wall. I think a different world awaits if you follow this.

I could have explored for hours.

The entrance to the Forbidden City

The Forbidden City

Hutong market

Gate to the Hutong market

Monkeys. On a bike. In the hutong.

A peek into one of the hutong doorways

Beijing street snacks

Hutong doorway decorated for Spring Festival

One of my favorite activities in Beijing was reading store signs.

Vibrant color was everywhere.

Temple of Heaven at dusk

A hot bowl of noodles on the way to the Great Wall. I cannot express how much I miss the food.

My sister and I by the National Center for the Performing Arts

A beautiful view of Houhai Lake. Taken one morning on a solitary stroll through the hutongs.

Sugar-glazed fruit. So yummy!

Taken in a bathroom stall complete with squat toilet. Use your imagination.

On that note, have a lovely day!

'til next time.

Traveling with Children: Tips from the Field Part III

Good morning friends! I've returned safe and sound from Beijing after a lovely trip. I'll catch you up to speed on my adventures in the next post, but for today, I've got a few more tips to share on traveling with children.

Let's dive in!

How to Pack

Pack light. This is my number one tip. Every travel guru says the same. Now, this is easily enough done when you are packing for yourself, but add a baby into the mix and it becomes so much harder. That being said, when we travel we usually take one moderately-sized suitcase for the three of us (we use an older model of this suitcase and love it). I’m not going to detail exactly what I pack, but it isn’t much - for any of us. I had to make peace with the fact that neither I nor my child were going to look super fashionable. I will say, lightweight, drapey tops and scarves are a go-to for me.

If you're addicted to coffee like I am, I'd recommend packing packets of instant coffee, like Starbucks Via. The places we stay rarely have any coffee-making capabilities, so unless breakfast comes with your room, plan ahead. (Thanks for this tip, Sara).

I use travel-size toiletries for just about everything. I hate filling up travel containers with my specific shampoo, so I just buy whatever brand is available in the travel aisle and go with that. I now have a bin in my bathroom solely dedicated to travel-size toiletries.

I highly recommend these travel cubes. They save space and keep each person’s clothes separate.

Reisenthel is a German brand that makes high-quality, durable bags (of all sorts). I swear by their Wrapcosmetic travel bag. I fit all of my cosmetics and toiletries in this bag and manage to squeeze in most of Mac's toiletries too.

We pack so that everything can be carried or worn by Ben and myself. For example: Ben wears Mac on his front, wears the diaper bag/backpack on his back, and pulls/lifts the suitcase. I wear M’s cot on my back, have my purse cross-body, and Mac’s stroller over my shoulder. This doesn’t matter so much if traveling by car, but if you’re not, this is essential.

I skip the traditional diaper bag when traveling and use a backpack.

Pack enough food and diapers to get you through one day past your arrival date and then buy more at your destination (this requires verifying that you will be staying near a grocery store). Sometimes, it is just easier to pack enough food and diapers for the whole trip, but this depends on how much room you want to take up with these things and on your destination.

I pack a few lightweight toys for Mac – stacking cups, cardboard blocks, an interactive toy, etc. Lightweight is the key. 

This is a very lightweight toy.

I keep all of our travel documents on my person at all times. This means five passports, three driver’s licenses, and Ben’s military orders. I highly recommend this wallet for organizing/carrying lots of documents. It is large enough to hold all of the above in addition to currency and is stylish enough to use as a clutch on an evening out (I can't think of the last time I've actually used it this way!).

Parental Survival

We try to protect Mac’s bedtime as much as possible when we travel. Sometimes this doesn’t happen, but we try, especially since he is out and about during the day. This is sometimes frustrating because we would like to go out to eat and enjoy the evening, but the stress of doing that with Mac past his bedtime often isn’t worth it. So here are my tips for enjoying an evening in (after the baby is asleep):

Grab some groceries and cook dinner (check out my last post on why renting an apartment is ideal) or, if you don’t have the ability to do that, buy some salami, cheese, bread, and wine and set up a picnic on your bed.

Always bring a laptop or tablet, as well as a set of earphones. We’re not smart enough to have bought a splitter yet, so we hunch together and share a set. Verify that the place you are staying has Wifi and rent a movie! Ben and I have enjoyed many evenings watching a movie, drinking wine, and eating bread, cheese and fruit. The best part? M is (hopefully) sleeping!

I always carry a roll of plastic dog-poo bags with me for M’s diaper. Trust me, if you are staying in a place where the trash is not emptied daily, these things really come in handy.

If you are visiting a large city and want a night out, use a babysitting agency like this one. I was very hesitant to use them at first, but after reading many good reviews, I decided to go out on a limb. We were extremely pleased with the babysitter the agency provided and felt very safe leaving Mac with her. It is a little on the pricey side, so we wouldn’t be able to do this for every trip, but it is definitely worth it once in a while (ala, Valentine's Day in Paris).

Valentine's Day sans Mac

And that's all I've got, folks! I hope these insights into our travel life were helpful.

Next post, I'll write about my adventures in Beijing!

‘til next time.

Traveling with Children: Tips from the Field Part II

Hello all! I hope your weekend was less eventful than ours. Mac decided to inhale popcorn into his lungs instead of swallowing and digesting like the rest of us. We spent Saturday night in a German hospital, where Mac received a bronchoscopy to retrieve the wayward kernel shell. It was a fascinating insight into the differences between the American and German healthcare system. But more on that in another post!

I left off last post with tips on how to fly, drive, and ride the subway with a baby. Today, I’m going to tackle eating on the go and where to stay. In the next post, I'll talk about how I pack and will share a few insights into how Ben and I make the trip enjoyable for the two of us. (As before, I am not being compensated in any way to endorse any product I mention below.) Let's get to business!

Eating on the Go

As I mentioned in my last post, eating out with Mac is my least favorite part of any trip we take. My first recommendation is to ask your host for child-friendly restaurant recommendations. Be forewarned, however. We did this in France and our host's recommendation led us to a white-tableclothed restaurant. Child-friendly in the U.S. means something completely different than in Europe. Here, it seems, it merely means that the restaurant is okay with having a child in their establishment. No crayons or paper tablecloths here.

Mac was unimpressed with the French cuisine

I have found that almost all German restaurants have highchairs. France is a different story, however. I recommend bringing a simple, portable high chair like My Infant Seat.  It slips over the back of most chairs, and, with the help of a clip and several ties, transforms from a small bundle of cloth into a very effective high chair. We took one to Paris, stuffed it in M’s diaper bag, and used it often. Keep in mind that a stroller can work as a chair as well, but I prefer not to use this in a small or nicer restaurant. We have also used the backpack carrier as a highchair, although mostly in our lodging and not in restaurants. Just set it on the floor, and voila, your child is restrained. 

In addition to the cloth high chair, I always pack a plastic spoon and plastic bib in M’s diaper bag. They’re easy to clean. Enough said.

Ben and I always have a game plan in a restaurant. We try to order fairly quickly and abstain from feeding Mac very much until we have our food. We have discovered several foods that are very portable and take Mac a long time to chew, thereby helping him wait for the main course (I’ll touch on these foods below). Once Ben and I receive our meals, we both feed M off of our plates. This usually allows us a fairly leisurely meal (read usually, not always) in which we order wine, an appetizer, main course, and sometimes, dessert. The key is to feed M fairly slowly. At the end of the meal, as Mac begins to get fussy, Ben packs him up and walks him outside while I get the check. We also have an Emergency Backup Plan which we have, to date, only had to use once. If Mac completely loses it and we are not done with our meal, one of us will take him outside and walk him around while the other finishes their food. Then we switch. We still haven’t figured out if asking for to-go boxes is something that is done here. Obviously this is not a problem in the U.S.

We have found a few foods that we always bring with us on trips. I mentioned bringing formula packets in my last post. These are great for flying, but also for any other trip where you will be on the move during bottle time. Another option is shelf-stable milk. This is easy to come by in Germany, but I am less sure about its availability in the States.

These “squishes” are golden. We stash a few in the diaper bag just in case Mac has no interest in solid food or if we are on the go during meal time. They are high in protein and usually have some grains as well. I choose these over fruit/veggie based squishes because they leave Mac full for a longer period of time. These are also great for a child who has not yet progressed to eating off an adult’s plate.

I mentioned above that we have a few foods that we take to restaurants as “appetizers” for Mac. Dates are fantastic baby appetizers. They are easily portable, sweet, and take a long time to chew. Mac will take twenty minutes to chew through three to four dates and by that time we usually have our food. We also often feed M from the ubiquitous bread bowl.

Ella's Kitchen Organic Nibbly Fingers are my new favorite travel food and fit into the "great appetizer" category. They are dense, soft granola bars that are high in fiber, very filling, and, you guessed it, take a long time for M to chew. Throw a few of these individually wrapped bars into a diaper bag and you’re set. 

Last but not least, Babybel cheese and string cheese make a great on-the-go food (don't worry, I do not buy the cheese on Amazon). I don’t worry much about the cheese getting warm, since we usually don’t travel more than 12 hours without a chance at some refrigerator time and they are individually wrapped.

Backpacking Europe

Two other key things. One, most of the foods I mentioned above are finger foods. Mac loves to feed himself and letting him do so usually distracts and amuses him. And two, one of the most helpful things we have EVER done is to put M on scheduled meals. He eats meals around 8 AM, noon, and 7 PM and has a bottle or snack at 4 PM. M eats when we eat, more or less. Obviously there are exceptions (meltdowns on planes, for instance), but most of the time, he sticks to the schedule. This frees us from carrying around loads of food and from constant snack breaks. Mac doesn’t expect to eat between these times and is usually content.

Where to Stay

We realized early on that no one in our family sleeps well if we are all in the same room, at least not with M at this age. Our entire approach to lodging revolves around this principle.

I always try to use Airbnb to arrange our lodging. I usually book an entire apartment with at least two rooms. This way, we can put Mac down in one room (usually the living room) and Ben and I can relax in our room for the rest of the evening. Obviously, two bedrooms are ideal but price is often the limiting factor for us. Renting an apartment also means we have access to a kitchen, which is wonderful because we don’t always eat dinner out. We will often skip a restaurant, grab some groceries, and cook dinner for ourselves. This allows Mac some play time after a busy day on the go and preserves the sacred institution of Bedtime.

If we have to stay in a hotel or bed and breakfast, we try to book one that has a bathroom large enough for M's cot to fit. No lie. I know it sounds gross and weird, but it works very well. Ben and I get completely ready for bed before M’s bedtime, put him to bed, and then close the door. I will say, however, that the last bathroom break before bed can be seriously hilarious, as it requires very stealthy ninja skills.

Where's M? I bet you can figure it out.

I talked about our travel cot in the last post, but just in case you didn’t get the message, IT IS AMAZING.

Last but not least, we always always always bring our iPad and use a white noise app. We put it in the room (or bathroom) M is in and turn the volume up. This means B and I can whisper without waking The Beast.

And there you have it! I'd love to hear about your travel hacks, frustrations, or victories. Drop me a line below and let's talk travel.

I'm heading to Beijing tomorrow to visit my sister, but look for the next post on Friday. I'll write about how I pack and some tricks Ben and I pull to actually enjoy our trip.

'til next time.